DO I LOOK LIKE A BOWLING PIN?

What a shocker today.

I had the best greeting this morning by the RESIDENT MONSTER. He's the resident scooby-doo on good days. I am talking about our 2 year old Staffordshire Cross Bull Terrier named Skippy. Because he's peanut butter brown. And mum thought the peanut butter brand Skippy was just the right one. He was one of several puppies being lined up to be put to sleep because there were no homes for them. So Ray brought him home one day afer work to become the 3rd member of a gang of brothers. In chronological order, Big Brother was Taco, a Chihuahua, followed by Dexter, the Border Collie, then Skippy.

So that's Skippy's little intro. What he did to me this morning was potentially fatal. And I mean seriously fatal, like head injury, unconscious, laying in Intensive Care type fatal. Skippy in his own doggie wisdom had figured I was also in a playful mood and decided to run into me from behind at full charge. As if he was the bowling ball and I was the bowling pin. By the time I heard him and turned around, it was too late to dodge him! He had run me over in front of the water tank and my head had missed the metal water pipes by millimetres. Not to mention the brick-laden garden floors. Imagine Gay Focker in "Meet the Parents" and his slow motion "Rrrooooaarrrr!!!" as he spiked the volleyball and broke his girlfriend's sister's nose . That was my exact expression. I went "Nnnnoooooooo!!!!" and before I knew it, I was flung up into the air, face up, and wham, back onto the floor. Miraculously, I kept my head up and my 60kg frame meant Newton's law of gravity made me fall with great speed. So I fell partially onto Skippy, saving my back.

You....you....you bloody dog!!!!!!

I had a go at punishing him afterwards by trying to smack him. But he thought I was playing with him!! Ohhhh...I give up!!! I threw my hands up in the air and took the nearest escape into the house.

Skippy is going to miss out on the Shmackos (doggie snacks that make dogs go wacko!) for a very looong time. Hmmph.